Avenue of Memories.

Avenue of Memories.

“I like cherry blossoms too, they flourish for a short time but are splendid and in a certain sense represent the fragility and the transience of life. For a moment, the picture in which you are walking and the trees, reminded me of my grandmother when as a child we were walking under the mimosas in bloom. At the end everything changes in life, from situations to people. Sometimes changes can be faster or slower, and sometimes they do not depend on us. I like your post and then it is as if you are walking in an avenue of memories.”

-Anonymous

I received this comment one of my most recent blog posts When Blossoms Bloom.  At first glance I was thinking, wow this a really nice, reflective response filled with so much nostalgic energy. But it wasn’t until after rereading it again later on, more closely, I realized what the message in it really was. The idea of it was exactly what fueled me to get into writing my blog, because it had the energy I wanted my readers to feel.

The transience of life is something that I’ve been thinking about more and mores the idea of time. Just that feeling of getting older and realizing that time can be healing or damaging, or feel fast or slow, but you can never get time back. When you finally get to that age that you were always wishing to be as a child, begging to be even, and you realize that life isn’t exactly an easy thing to handle. And sometimes there are days when you wake up and miss the feeling of waking up feeling carefree on Saturdays and no worries on your mind. Looking back 20 years feels almost like yesterday, but then when you actually look around you realize that you’re a totally different person that has been tested, shaped and refined by life.

Life really is fragile in a sense, because nothing in this life is permanent. Every day I’m thinking of how I just want to go back to the 90s when all I cared about was Sunday night Skate 22, Rugrats movies, Pinho’s cupcakes and riding around in my mom’s old Ford Explorer in Roselle. And how I miss polaroid cameras and listening to Jon B. and Joe playing on the radio. I mostly miss how on those long rides to Cranford or Paramus, I used to always look out the window and watch the scenery and the trees flash by, just fast enough for my eyes to just catch the trees in their essence and their beauty. And now when I daydream I’m looking back, chasing this feeling of how can I get that feeling back? All thats left are the blurred memories.

I’m grateful for this message. I wanted my readers and everyone to read this and always remember that we should never take anything in life for granted, because things can change at any moment. The quote ended on the idea of this avenue of memories, and I love this, because I feel like at the end of the day thats all we’re left with. Memories of a time, of a song, of a feeling, of people. Whether we admit it or not, we’re all constantly longing for what used to be, but I guess to me that’s what reminiscing really is.

Thank you for this comment and to everyone whose been here reminiscing with me,  and encouraging me.

-XoReminissy

iReminiss 

Patience is a Virtue.

Patience is a Virtue.

I’ve been thinking about how growing up I never finished the things I started. I wasn’t really into sports per say, but I did love dance and cheer, and I actually did like softball and gymnastics when I tried it. I was flexible, I could move, I could be coached, I learned fast and I could remember routines. I never stuck with any of it and I regret it so bad, because all of the time and effort I did put into it went in vain. I didn’t give myself time to develop and now I’ll never know who I could’ve became.

I learned that patience is something I lack that I need more of. It’s like I’ll love to do something, and I aspire to be great at it, but it’s hard for me to endure the wait to greatness. I guess the stress of the idea of failure is scary for me, but no one successful at anything made it on an easy route. I saw a video Will Smith made about failure the other day, and he said that if you’re going to be successful at anything you’re going to have to accept and embrace the idea of failure. He said that you have to constantly push yourself to the limit in order to learn yourself and what you can endure.

It’s true though, because the idea of knowing that pushing yourself can lead to picking up the pieces when you fail is the hardest part. If there’s anything I’ve learned in life thus far is that you should always go for what you want, no matter the mistakes or disappointment it may lead to, because anybody around you that’s actually doing something took the risk. The pain that reminiscing on shoulda coulda woulda is far worse than anything, especially when you realize that you were the only thing standing in your own way of something great.

I think that you have to get yourself to the edge and persevere just when you’re about to crumble, then do or don’t. But constantly thank God for lessons learned when you take that risk, because you’re learning and growing on the way to where you want to be.

Remember that patience is a virtue so be patience with yourself, learn yourself, know yourself and push yourself to the limit. There’s everything to loose if you don’t.

-XoReminissy

Woes.

Woes.

Friend:

A person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically exclusive of sexual or family relations.

Hmm, being around people with similar backgrounds and situations always made me feel secure like they can understand what I’m going through. Like for example, working in restaurants was perfect for me in college because everybody there is stressed out, classes pissing us off, guests pissing us off, and bills on a timer just pissing us off! You share the same drive so you’re willing to give up your shift when you’re good and you’re always secretly rooting for them to make what they need by the end of the night. I’ve made some of my best friends being around them, struggling together, growing together and getting to know their stories.

Friendship was always so important to me though, and now I’m not even sure what my definition even means in a sense. Being an ear, a shoulder, a ventilation system, being reciprocal. Sharing a bond of mutual affection.

Sometimes I feel like friendship can ruin you. If you let it, (I guess) when all of those things are lacking for you. You begin to doubt your own judgment of people. I don’t know, I guess it has to be mutual so it’s normal in life when you grow up to grow apart from people and it’s weird because, how can grow up with a person and then grow apart from them? Seeing them grow made you excited and you used to look back at each other and see how far you’ve come. You think you’re always going to be around for everything life changing and then one day they no longer know anything about you. Rekindling seems pointless and the pain it leaves stings when you remember that one crazy time you laughed so hard together.

I mean aside from your siblings, and way aside from your parents, they’re the ones who know you the best. They listen, don’tnever judge, and somehow make everything alright, so how is it that they can become your family and then they just disappear into the past? One day you’re so similar then next thing you’re not. I guess the keyword really does have to be mutual. Whatcha think?

-XoReminissy

 

Nostalgia, Reflection, Growth. (Making the same Mistakes)

Nostalgia, Reflection, Growth. (Making the same Mistakes)

This is starting to become a part of who I am. Looking back is a part of learning and growing and moving forward. I thank God every day for the past though, and lessons learned, and for the chances we get to not make the same mistakes. I’m truly grateful for the time we get to experience and mature, and it’s inevitable we all got to grow up sometime.

I knew I was growing up when I realized that the same patterns in my actions will yield the same results. And when I realized this, my life started to actually yield the results I wanted.

Results are what we want, but repetition is so easy and so comfortable, and a majority of the time it gets us nowhere. It just leads us down the same road of frustration and disappointment. I didn’t start getting somewhere until I decided to start taking some chances, dip my toe in, get my feet wet. Move to a different city, take a different job, be spontaneous. I spend a lot of time consulting with other people about what’s in my own heart. How can you even do that? A part of growing up is trusting your own gut, judging yourself off of what you’ve done in the past to know your own capabilities and what you can accomplish.

 

I think that a lot of the time the ones closest to us can also be the ones who could ultimately hold us back the most. They just know your mistakes. You also know your mistakes, and you know what you should, would, and could do. But there comes a time where we have to break free from our old habits and repetitive, negative actions.

It’s a simple formula really:

Nostalgia

  Think Back (what was the situation)

Reflection

 Think About It (what did you learn from this, what could I do different)

Growth

 Move Forward (don’t make the same mistake).

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“…Repition is so easy and so comfortable, and a majority of the time it leads us nowhere.”

Know yourself, don’t let your old self get in the way of who you’re trying to become. The seasons changing, so it’s the perfect time to embrace it. You’re better off growing.

-XoReminissy

iReminiss

iReminiss

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I’ve finally started my official blog and I’m so excited! I call this my official blog, but I do have a Tumblr that I used to use to publish my blogs. Lately, I’ve just been feeling like that’s not where people go to actually sit and read blogs without skimming them and sifting through to the pictures at the end. Plus I have a couple friends on WordPress, so I did my research. I mean Tumblr is entertaining do not get me wrong, I love Tumblr!  I really just wanted somewhere where I could get my blogs out my notepad on my phone, get out what I’m feeling and get serious about this. I want to get some feedback from some fellow bloggers, see if people can feel me. I feel like my story could actually be entertaining for some. Maybe there’s some people out there who can relate to me, how I feel and who I really am inside.

But I’m just a Jersey girl, I’m 23, I’m little and brownskin and people think I’m still in high school. I mean, my story isn’t one for the books by any means, but I also know that what I’ve been through in life has shaped me and helped me become someone different. I find myself in a daze, daydreaming most of the time just sitting and reflecting, replaying memories in my mind. Reminiscing. This is how I began to grow.

At first, Reminiss was just a cute little twitter name I thought of just playing off of my real name, Anissa. But then as I really started blogging and social media, even after I deleted my Twitter I felt like it was fitting for me because of the way that I already am. Then I thought, why not just make this my whole brand? I like the idea of it, because I feel like it’s me, it’s what I’m about. All I want to do is sit around and share my day, share my feelings, share my memories, share my aspirations. I just want to express myself in a way that other people can really feel, I want to connect with people who’ve been through similar situations and circumstances. I just want to tell my story exactly how it is, like we’re sitting hanging out, chatting over tea or something.

iReminiss is my new baby, I’m proud of it. I’m proud of myself for finally just saying “go for it,” and putting my fears and anxieties about it aside. I know that this is something that I’ve been wanting to do for a while now and I feel like I’ve finally found my voice. I’m excited because I always have a lot to say and my story is only beginning. This is the beginning of my new journey.  This could be something big, but if it ends up being used only for sheer enjoyment that’d be enough for me!

So if you’re reading this, hello and welcome to iReminiss! Don’t forget to like, comment and subscribe! You can also follow me on Tumblr, IG and Snapchat. My YouTube Channel is coming soon. Links on the sidebar!