When Blossoms Bloom.

When Blossoms Bloom.

Isn’t the sight of Cherry Blossoms so reminiscent of the season changing? Whenever I see them I get that familiar feeling of May, flowers, warm breeze, and warm weather approaching. Spring fever! I think I’ve got it, and I’m not ashamed. I just want to open up my windows, get out for some fresh air, and breathe easy!


When I saw this whole street lined at the curb with these beautiful trees, I was in awe because I love cherry blossoms they’re, nostalgic to me. They remind me of walking around Rahway as a teenager, down Cherry Street, near the train station and by my old dance studio. I was mostly shocked to see them here though, right in the middle of an area that is full of warehouse apartments, pavement, and brick walls. Not too many trees and shrubs. I mean I’ve seen some cacti around, but who doesn’t love flowers and the way they can light up the aesthetic of a city neighborhood?

This day was more to me than just going out to get some pretty pictures, though. I wanted to get these pictures for my blog so that I could share this experience. I had planned to go do a little shoot, but when I got up this Sunday morning it was overcast, it was cold, I was short on time because my mom was coming to visit and plus I wanted to go to Church. Immediately, I started thinking of every excuse not to go do this and just stay in bed, because the idea of it just seemed like more of an annoyance at this point.  But then I started thinking of those episodes of Top Model and how even when the models had just came from traveling abroad, they’re tired, its cold. They JUST DO IT! And that’s what sets them apart from everyone else that just continues to dream.

I wanted to capture this moment while they’re still in bloom as a reminder that the seasons are ever changing, and when you start having second thoughts about the things you have to do and sacrifice in order to make your dreams come true, just do it! The blossoms bloom even when its still cold and wintery, they just know their time. Your time is now.


RVA Blues.

RVA Blues.

Everyone expects to graduate from college after years of focus and dedication and land their dream job right away. And although it seems like the idea of it is, nothing short of deserved, it usually isn’t the case for most people. It definitely wasn’t like that for me. I chose a major that was interesting to me and and fun to learn, but when I got into the workplace I found that maybe it really wasn’t my thing. I tried it. I tried management, I tried sales, I tried Human Resources, I tried customer service, I tried restaurant, I tried recruiting. I tried writing.

Since college, I feel like I’ve been bouncing around everywhere. From town to town, job to job. And now I’m stuck in rut because I feel like I know what I want to pursue, but just not how to pursue it fully.

Until now, I was kind of embarrassed that I’m in a new role like every few months, or going back to serving every time I quit a place. It was starting to become a joke where my managers were betting how long it would be until I’d be back again. But aside from that, every job has potential to teach you skills that you’ll be able to take with you to any job.

When I look back, every one of those jobs taught me something vital to my success in anything. I learned how to be administrative, I learned how to interact with people, be prompt,  I learned how to manage, how to pitch myself, there’s literally a million things. If pursuing writing means I need to have these things in order to be able to start a free lancing business, I already have those skills so why not. Skills are instilled.  You bring whatever skills you have, or acquire, to the table in anything you go after.

I got to talk to an old professor recently, Dr. Mier. He checks in on us from time to time. I was telling him about how I’m going through this post- collegiate blues. What stood out to me, aside from his new consulting firm, was how he just told me that it sounds like I’m doing great, and that it sounds like I’m figuring it out. It’s true though, I figured out that I really do like writing so why shouldn’t I pursue it? I just need to keep telling myself that I have what it takes to be successful in running my own business. And him starting a consulting firm makes me realize that you should just go after whatever makes you happy. Where do you derive happiness?

I realized I shouldn’t be all that embarrassed. I don’t see the point in spending time in any career that you find early on that you just cannot see yourself doing for 30, 40 years. Like no, that’s just not how I am. I’m absolutely not knocking anyone who does that, I’m just saying that I personally just cannot imagine hating my job until I retire. I derive happiness from staying intrigued and busy and challenged, but unbothered and autonomous and entertained, all at the same time. And I think that many of these things could come with working for myself, it could be very rewarding and fun!

The post collegiate blues can be hard to go through and get over. Shifting your main focus from studying and going to class, to bills and chasing your dreams kind of seems like night and day. Just remember to chase the things in life that you’re drawn to do, and things that make you happy doing it. And even if you absolutely hate a job or have hated a job and never want to look back at it, it’s never a total loss. You’d be surprised how much more prepared you will feel in life if you just look back on jobs or on any negative experience in life with a positive mindset and realize the gains.

Well, I’m back in RVA now and this is the first time in the three times that I’ve been back that I actually feel like I know what I’m doing, thank God for that. There’s art everywhere, the view is good, the city lights are bright and there’s a mural outside my window that makes me feel like I’m getting a new chance. The energy is inspiring, it feels like the perfect place to start over, and this time with a purpose.


Peach Lemonade.

Peach Lemonade.

As you grow older you start to look at things from a totally different point of view. You realize the things your parents probably went through, but shielded you from. You realize what a bitchy teenager you used to be. You stop dwelling on small things, because when you look at the bigger picture you know that there are many other colossal things to stress about. You realize what’s important. When you’re up in life you learn things. Things about life, about the world, about about yourself, about people. When your circumstance allows you to hit rock bottom, it changes you and you learn even more, but overnight.

I’m starting to think that at any age circumstance is life’s biggest teacher, and how you respond to different circumstances is an even bigger realization of your character and who you are becoming.  I’ve learned the most about myself through the worst situations, and right at the beginning of the year when everything is supposed to be peachy and sweet.

Life will not always be peachy, and if it was we’d never appreciate the liberation of getting through rough times. Now I’ve been sitting with this for some weeks actually, and I guess I was having a hard time putting what I felt into words, but I knew once I was ready the words would come and I’ve been looking forward to the moment when I could share some of the things I’ve learned so far in 2018.


I don’t think I’ve ever really understood the true meaning of being courageous until now. It seems like something you have to have to make it through scary situations, but there’s more to it than that. Encouraging someone is like instilling the will into them that they need but don’t have, so having courage is like instilling that same will into yourself. Courage is important, because at some point you’re going to be broken and the journey ahead is going to be foggy and uncertain, and that courage inside you is going to lead the way to get you through.


In Church I learned that sometimes we allow our negative feelings about something or towards something prevent us from moving forward. Feels are inevitable, but even if you feel hurt, angry or discouraged, feelings can’t kill you. There’s truth in this, because there are times when it really does feel like the way we feel during a situation is killing us when it’s too hard to bare. But sometimes you have to swallow your feelings at that moment or for how ever long you need to, to stay focused on what your plan is to overcome. Feelings will not kill you!


What are you willing to do for the things you want in life? What are you willing to sacrifice? What if you had to sacrifice your vices, your alone time, your comfort, your stability? Would you do it? You have to know your reasons to do what you have to do, and for you. Always.


I don’t know too many things about love, but the heart wants what it wants and it can be consuming. Don’t wear your heart on your sleeve, don’t be too transparent. Listen, reciprocate, empathize and support and never let your own emotions get in the way of hearing someone’s point of view.  Give and receive love, but never let your love be abused and misused. Love yourself first, foremost, and fully, no matter what it takes.


Sometimes its hard to accept the cards you’ve been dealt in life, even I’m guilty of being envious of things that other people were blessed to have and I wasn’t. I guess its only natural, but privilege in life doesn’t mean anything if you take it for granted rater than use it to your advantage. You cannot dwell on the things that you don’t have in life, because you’re given what you need in life. Whether it be money, material things, drive or ambition, you have everything you need inside of you to be all you can be.


I wasn’t raised in a church, but I was definitely raised to pray. I used to only do it because I was told to though, so I never really experienced the sheer power in prayer or the miracles that could happen when you stay faithful to God. I never knew the pure joy of deliverance, or the feeling of knowing that I’d been delivered until God was the only one I could depend on. I had never even experienced Joy, until I started to depend on God, and now I know that He always knows what’s in your heart. There’s peace and happiness when you find a Church you like, a gospel song that touches you or a bible verse that speaks to you. I’m proud that I have come to faith on my own and on my own terms, and without the pressure of anyone’s influence, because there’s beauty in prayer and spiritual awakening.


The grass isn’t always greener on the other side. Our perceptions of what’s good for us always gets in the way and you can’t let perception blind your reality. When the road gets rocky, don’t always be so quick to assume that a decision that works well for the short term will also work well in the long run. Be patient, persevere, and learn to wait for greater chances for greater outcomes.


The idea of change used to be scary for me and its true that in the past dealing with change has been very uncomfortable, but through adaption comes evolution.  I’ve learned that you have to adapt to every situation you find yourself in. See the positive and the opportunities that change presents, because that’s the only way you’ll survive. I mean, even animals do it.

“I’ve learned the most about myself through the worst of situations, and right at the beginning of the year when everything is supposed to be peachy and sweet.”

There’s courage in strength, strength in sacrifice, sacrifice in love, patience in faith, adaption in privilege. In life nothing is ever guaranteed or guaranteed to stay peachy and sweet, but be fruitful when life starts throwing you lemons and just make lemonade. You have no choice!



Choose Your Vibe.

Choose Your Vibe.

Wow, it’s New Years already! I never realized how much could actually change in a year’s time. There’s been so many ups and downs, and tears and lows but, even in the worse situations these circumstances are only short lived, and the blessings reaped from the struggles make all the pain worth it. I haven’t been myself for a really long time, some years actually, but I feel myself slowly getting back to the old me. For the first time I finally feel like I can smile more, laugh more genuinely. My spirit is just so uplifted and this year I just want to hold on to it.

Now I normally do not make New Year’s resolutions, just because, but this year I just want to focus on my vibe and my inner peace. Here are 6 ways I feel like you can protect your vibe.


Protect your vibe.

Demand your Respect. Don’t allow people to talk to you any kind of way, stand up for yourself. People will only get away with as much as you will allow, and they will walk all over you if they get the chance. Set the tone, demand your respect.

Say whats on your heart. It is important to choose your battles, but you should express whats on your mind freely and speak your truth when the time is relevant. Holding on to bad energy will burden you, and eat you alive. Communication should be your way to release your burdens and free yourself.

Make time for yourself.  Loving yourself and learning yourself is so important. You have to take a step back from your own world, where you will get consumed in doing things for those that you care about. Why not take some you time and go get a pedicure, get your hair done, read a good book. You deserve it!

Let go. You cannot receive your blessings when you hold on to those that are hindering you. Whether it be friends or family, it can be the ones closest to us that will hurt us, stress us out, and hold us back. It’s not being selfish for wanting to distance yourself from people who just aren’t good for your well-being overall.

Be yourself. The best feeling is being comfortable in your own skin. When you don’t have to hide your true self, your interests, your wants, your needs, your goals, your aspirations. It’s selfish and takes too much energy trying to change yourself for other people, so why would you?

Pray. Make time, because God is always on time. Always.

Don’t settle for less than what you deserve in life. You should have standards that are going to reflect you as an individual. At the end of the day you don’t want people or things around you who are ruining you and draining your energy. You choose your vibe, so you must protect it at all times!



Blogmas day 11: Get back to, you.

Blogmas day 11: Get back to, you.


Christmas shopping is actually really annoying. Luckily I live close to the mall, but why are the stores so crowded every single time of day? I can see why people just save themselves the trouble and just shop online, but then what do I do when I need tangible things? I have to touch and sniff everything I need!

Honestly, after adding this to my day I just need to come home and clean up to clear my mind. I need to do repetitive stuff to clear my mind, it’s like it’s so easy to focus on without actually focusing on it. It’s pretty strange, but I love cleaning it’s so good for anxiety. I digress, but for a good purpose. I’m just trying to stress the fact that I need to recharge myself and recollect when I get home. I need to go sit by myself and daydream. No music no nothing just chill, relax, breathe.

There’s just something so intangible about taking the time to just sit and understand yourself, understand your own feelings. I love being able to, but I think it took a lot of practice to sit and listen to myself and actually hear what I’m saying. I guess I really need that time in my day because other people’s vibes and energies can be so draining. Its like they’re just projecting on to me all day, it is so stressful. That’s why I hate the stores!


Maybe that’s why people meditate and what have you to help with things like that…I don’t know. I just never understood how important it was for me until like, just now. I just like to take the time to just recharge and get back to, ya know, me.



Blogmas Day 4: Keep Up the Momentum.

Blogmas Day 4: Keep Up the Momentum.

Okay, so my attempt at Blogmas didn’t quite go as planned being that I only did day one so far, and it really wasn’t even Christmas related, and that’s okay I make my own rules! I digress but, I’m going to get back on it. It’s actually harder than I thought to blog every day because some days I just don’t feel inspired. Either I’m tired from my day, got sidetracked or I just don’t feel that bloggy. 

But even though we are tired, it’s said that we shouldn’t spend all day working for someone else and then come home and not work on our own dreams and aspirations. Hmm, that’s true. Of course, the pressure of life’s demands can get overwhelming at times, and it seems like there’s just not enough time to fit in what we want to do after spending so much time doing everything we have to do. Yea, everything we planned to do sounds great in our minds, but once we get around to it, our bodies are telling us something different. Lay down, get to it later. I mean, more than once a week I get up for work and I’m just like no, and I get off from work and I’m just like no, then I get home from work and I’m just like no! I don’t wanna!

We’re working towards our dream job, one that when we get it won’t actually feel like work. On the other hand, we’ve all had jobs that we don’t particularly like or what we’re doing has nothing to do with our degrees. It doesn’t make sense to us, but sometimes we gotta do what we gotta do. We take that job serving nights in college so we can work and go to school, we work that internship before serving for no pay so we can get that experience, we take that entry- level opportunity after school just to get our feet wet. These sacrifices enable us to save a little room to grow later.

There comes a time where we should consider the things that we aren’t satisfied with in life and find ways to change it. It’s hard because we have to learn how to use the things that we are unsatisfied with, to enable us to chase our dreams. Make the sacrifice and push yourself then keep up the momentum! Make a schedule and stick to it, set attainable goals, but don’t sell yourself short. Working on our own goals should make putting up with the things that enable us to work on our dreams worth it in the end. Because it will be worth it in the end!

I’m back on for Blogmas y’all!


Nostalgia, Reflection, Growth. (Making the same Mistakes)

Nostalgia, Reflection, Growth. (Making the same Mistakes)

This is starting to become a part of who I am. Looking back is a part of learning and growing and moving forward. I thank God every day for the past though, and lessons learned, and for the chances we get to not make the same mistakes. I’m truly grateful for the time we get to experience and mature, and it’s inevitable we all got to grow up sometime.

I knew I was growing up when I realized that the same patterns in my actions will yield the same results. And when I realized this, my life started to actually yield the results I wanted.

Results are what we want, but repetition is so easy and so comfortable, and a majority of the time it gets us nowhere. It just leads us down the same road of frustration and disappointment. I didn’t start getting somewhere until I decided to start taking some chances, dip my toe in, get my feet wet. Move to a different city, take a different job, be spontaneous. I spend a lot of time consulting with other people about what’s in my own heart. How can you even do that? A part of growing up is trusting your own gut, judging yourself off of what you’ve done in the past to know your own capabilities and what you can accomplish.

I think that a lot of the time the ones closest to us can also be the ones who could ultimately hold us back the most. They just know your mistakes. You also know your mistakes, and you know what you should, would, and could do. But there comes a time where we have to break free from our old habits and repetitive, negative actions.

It’s a simple formula really:

  • Nostalgia – Think Back (what was the situation),
  • Relfection -Think About It (what did you learn from this, what could I do different), and
  • Growth – Move Forward (don’t make the same mistake).img_0409

“…Repition is so easy and so comfortable, and a majority of the time it leads us nowhere.”

Know yourself, don’t let your old self get in the way of who you’re trying to become. The seasons changing, so it’s the perfect time to embrace it. You’re better off growing.